Interview with Jake Starr in Deadbeat - October 1998
First I'd like to introduce myself. I am Denmom, hear me roar (well, burp anyway). I started out being a reeeeyalll punk in 1976 when I heard the Ramones' first offering in DC, where I grew up. Since then, I've been totally sold and never been led astray by any other type of music...having been molested first by the MC5 and then the Stooges at an early age. Then I moved on to serious garage rock, it being my passion...the Sonics still are louder, faster and harder than anyone in recent memory (present company excepted, Jakester!).
When I moved to NYC in '78, I met a lot of people in the punk 'community' --some moved on to be hipsters on the scene, others self conscious steroid abusing egomaniacs. Regardless, anyone I ever loved, I'll love til I die, says this Venus Loon. I worked hard on fanzines and fandom, even when it sort of blew apart when Sid dispatched Nancy, too bad Judge Roy Bean wasn't presiding during the arraignment...'Well, son, did she NEED killing?'
Later, my font of knowledge of the early punk scene was tapped by my spiritual son, Mark Kennedy of Misfits Central. I knew a lot and had a lot of information about the early 'Fits and Mark knocked on my brain for some of that fine stuff. I met Jake there, on the Misfits Bible where I was regaling morons with tales of 'the early days'. Interestingly, I was pleased to see that he'd not fled DC, as I had, out of frustration with the limitations of the 'scene' and the observers. He's a good guy, a badass Jew, and a great storyteller. Listen up kids. Jake's been called everything from 'faggot' to 'rockstar' (like thats an insult! puhleeze!). He's trying to bring a little hardcore garage rock into the corporate scene, but he's not above using big boobed babes to lure you inside his little world of sleaze, fun, and rock and roll.
ADAM WEST --the band-- comes from a young Jake asking an aging star to sign an 8x10 glossy. He looked at the words 'To Jake==from Adam West' so much, he decided to name his band exactly that...ADAM WEST! They began in 1991, but today in 1998 they're still at it, amusing, sexy, fun, and rock as hard as you can stand. No, this isn't punkrock like GreenDay or the Sex Pistols would like you know, but true punk, which we all know begins in the garage.
Denmom: Hi, Jake would you like to introduce the rest of the band?
Jake Starr: Actually, since I'm the ego-megalomaniac that I am, I don't want to introduce the rest of the band. But since I'm in love with you, I'll respect your wishes this one time: Derrick Baranowsky plays the gee-tar, Tom Barrick plays the drums, and Steve (no last name available) play the bass.
D: How many incarnations of Adam West have there been?
JS: Too fucking many! It's those damn guitar players that keep leaving me! Well, I'd say we're at Adam West Mark 5 now according to line-up. According to sound and direction, we're only at Mark 3. We started out as a 60s British Invasion mod band, then went to a Stooges/Radio Birdman band, now we're a Stooges/MC5/60s garage/Misfits/Sabbath band. Does that confuse you like it confuses me?
D: What was your biggest hit so far?
JS: Hard to say cuz we get played on the radio a lot in DC. We're registered with ASCAP who are supposed to pay us when we're played on the radio. But every quarter I get a form letter stating that we weren't played. What that really means is those fuckers weren't monitoring the station when we were played and the station didn't provide complete playlists to ASCAP, which is typical. Let's give all the 4¢ royalties to asswipes like SmashMouth and Bush! Different stations have played the following: "Upside Down," "Speedbump," "Halloween/She," "Vehicle," "Oscar the Grouch," "Love Like a Stone," and more.
D: Any good groupie stories?
JS: After one show in Blacksburg, Va., one of the ugliest girls at the club asked me home to a hot tub party with her. Yikes! Another time at CBGBs in NYC, a beautiful girl was asking my dad how to "get" me. My dad comes to almost every show, even in NYC. Anyway, she bought all our records and a t-shirt and was hanging all over me. My dad's become my pimp!
D: What's been your best review so far?
JS: I think my favorite review came from Flipside about the "Beauty" 7". I think they said it was "too rock-n-roll" and that I was "sexy, macho vocalist." All of that was supposed to be negative, and in Flipside's fucked-up eyes, it is. How can one be "too" rock-n-roll? What assholes! I mean, we're a rock-n-roll band. We don't sound like Poison or Warrant or anything like that. We sound like the Stooges! How could those punk rock elitist fucks say we were too rock-n-roll. Whatever.
D: The worst review? and how did you retaliate?
JS: See above. I really didn't do anything to retaliate except I'm never sending Flipside another record to review. Their loss.
D: Who would you rather fuck, Mark McGwire or Sammy Sosa? Just kidding! Seriously, Heather Locklear or Pamela Anderson?
JS: Pamela Anderson by far. Honestly, she's not dumb and she's not a bad actress either. I mean, I like her. And since I'm a fan of the Russ Meyer School of Tittage, I'd definitely go for Pamela. Yeah, yeah, I know they're fake and she's five-foot-one and everything, but I'd do her. Of course, I'd rather fuck Salma Hayek, but you didn't ask me that.
D: What's your favorite position?
JS: I like 68. That's where you suck my dick and I owe ya one.
D: What inspired 'Speedbump' (:P) like I don't know!?
JS: I always wanted to get a 70s custom van and drive around the junior high schools, luring 13-year-old girls into the shag-carpeted back for a little weedage and a little cockage. I finally bought a van a couple months ago and hung up the blacklight posters and shit. But alas, no 13-year-olds yet.
D: Personal philosophy?
JS: Do whatever the fuck you want as long as it doesn't hurt anyone else. Unless they wanna be hurt, of course.
D: What do you think of the 'new' punk rock? Any other music out now you dig at all?
JS: If you're talking about shit like Green Day, Offspring, or Goldfinger, it's the absolute worst fucking shit out there. I'd rather listen to the Spice Girls than that bogus shite! The *real* punk rock out there is bands like the Candy Snatchers, Electric Frankenstein, the Hookers, Nashville Pussy, New Bomb Turks, the Hellacopters, the Humpers, Zeke, the B-Movie Rats, and all the cool-ass garage punk bands that nobody's ever heard of. It's all out there. Sometimes on a 7" that's so good it'll make you cry and blow a load at the same time; or sometimes on a CD on a shit label like Epitaph, who won't promote the good stuff but instead rams shit like Rancid and Pennywise down our throats.
D: Do you like goth chix?
JS: In college, I thought I was Telegram Sam and would go after all the cute goth chix who were five-foot-one, had blue-black hair, tons of make-up, and black boots with 8 buckles on each one. I still like girls who look like Morticia, but I prefer Betty Page lookalikes these days.
D: Any homosexual experiences you'd care to share with the group?
JS: Uh, er, uh. Can you repeat the question, please?
D: If you were gay, who would you do? (and Jake, Hanson does not count! they really ARE girls so it wouldnt be truly gay sex)
JS: Well, since Hanson's off the list, I'd have to say Benicio del Toro. He's good-looking and the coolest guy out there right now. A few years ago, maybe River Phoenix, but I hear he ain't looking so good these days.
D: What's your favorite website?
JS: (www.splattermountain.com) This guy has the sickest fucking videos on the planet. Chix rubbing shit all over themselves and others. The subtitle states, "Guaranteed to induce vomiting at any family gathering."
D: When will Adam West come down to the sunny south?
JS: Adam West would love to come down to the sunny south, but it's all a matter of dough, baby. When we get signed or something equivalent, we'll be there. Then you won't be able to get rid of us.
D: Thanks! now the boy reporter Gigantor would like to ask a few questions for DEADBEAT: (my son, Michael, is quite the little Lester Bangs. He desires to ask these questions of all mommy's rock star buddies.....uncensored, here you have a real 10 yr old asking the same damn questions!)
G: Are you related to Kenneth Starr?
JS: Yes, he's my mother.
G: What is your favorite video game?
JS: The only game I ever really liked was the arcade game Asteroids. I've never played PlayStattion or any home video games.
G: Are you a natural blond?
JS: Oh yeah. Wanna see?
G: Do you like wrestling?
G: Did you ever serve in the military?
JS: Hell nope!
G: What's your favorite song in the whole world?
JS: That's a tough one. In high school, I really loved "The Real Me" by the Who. I also loved "I Turned into a Martian" by the Misfits. Hmmm, what's the name of that great Hanson song again?
G: What's your favorite movie?
JS: "Beyond the Valley of the Dolls" by Russ Meyer. Don't see until you're 18, okay?
G: Do you think my mom is hot? (he really asked this, jake. I didnt put him up to it! he is 10 now you know)
JS: Hell yeah!
G: Where will Adam West play next?
JS: Believe it or not, we're playing a gay club in DC on Oct. 15. Don't ask!
G: Are you a Commie or not?
JS: My heritage is Russian, but no, I'm no Commie.
G: I can't think of anything else so good bye. Thanks, Jake!
JS: Well, Gigantor, you and your mom have a great day and think of ol' Jake Starr on stage breaking his back for his adoring audience. Y'all come back now, y'hear?
You can reach Jake and look over ADAM WEST'S impressive webpage here:
Jake Starr/ADAM WEST
1805 T Street, NW #A
Washington, DC 20009-7184
I recommend the CD MONDO ROYALE. Not only does it sport a beautiful bikini'd babe with humongous tatas on the cover, brandishishing a handgun (wonder whut that means, huh?) it's pretty damn great. 'Speedbump' and 'Electrified' are the bomb. Check em out! If any of you cheap ass little punks out there wanna hear the early stuff, send me an email and send me a blank cassette, and I'll tape my vinyl AW for you. I have it all. Colored vinyl gets me off.
By Denmom (Patricia Ragan Hoehner firstname.lastname@example.org), Deadbeat, October 1998
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